Craft Fail

I'm feeling very under-accomplished as a mom right now. I see my friends with babies on facebook post status updates about all of the clothes they've made for their babies, the cakes and pies they've baked, the marathons they've run, and I'm like, "Really?? You have time to do all that?"

I have wanted to crochet R a hat FOREVER. I am still trying to crochet her a hat. I take the blame for refusing to follow directions. I find patterns that I like, but I refuse to use the acrylic yarn that the pattern calls for and choose to use natural fibers instead, because I'm difficult like that. But then the hat turns out way too small because even though the yarn widths are the same, they refuse to crochet up the same way. So then I have to alter the pattern to make it fit around R's head, which gets me stuck in a cycle of waiting for her to be both in a good mood and awake for me to test it on her, rip some progress out to do it over, wait to try it on her again, etc. I have been stuck in this cycle for so so long on not only one, but two hats now. And I'm getting really fed up with it. Why can't the yarns that I like have cute baby patterns to go with them???

I am also in the beginning stages of sewing her a Halloween costume, and I am terrified because, once again, I do not have a pattern. Tonight I was able to sew two seams by hand. There are many more seams to go. I'm using stretchy fabric that the sewing machine keeps trying to eat, which leaves me no choice but to hand sew a lot of it. Not to mention the fact that I'm wary of sewing machines in general. I like the slow perfection that can be attained with hand-stitching, but that's just it: it's slow. Once I sew a couple more seams, then I will need to try it on her again, and hope, hope, hope that everything is going well.

My craft projects run on hope. And no time. And difficult decision making. No wonder I can't get anything done.

It doesn't help matters any that Senpai hasn't had a day off in the past 17 days. If he were here more often it'd be easier For us to both keep R entertained and get chores taken care of. Then perhaps there would be a bit more time leftover for me to do something else besides pump breastmilk, do laundry, wash dishes, or prepare food. It's not as if he had a choice in the matter though. I'm looking forward to his time off this coming weekend and I'm sure he is, too. In the meantime I'm falling asleep. Time for bed.